21 Mar 2016

5 Tactics For Healthy Co-parenting With Your Ex

If you have children, then you know how difficult it is to be a parent. Parenting is hard enough when the marriage is healthy. Co-parenting is not just for divorced couples. It applies to everyone.

But, when you’re divorced and have to deal with parenting plans, child support, extra-curricular activities and custody issues, that makes parenting even more stressful.

I always tell clients that just because the marriage didn’t work out doesn’t mean you can’t co-parent effectively and have a healthy post-divorce relationship. It’s very possible, but like everything when it comes to relationships, it takes two to make it work.

Here are five tactics you can use to help you better co-parent with your ex:

1. Don’t micro manage each other.

Divorced or not, parents often have differences about how to handle various situations with the children. Take your toddler not wanting to eat dinner and throwing a tantrum.

One parent may say let the toddler go to bed hungry and that will teach him/her to eat. The other parent may say make something else because he/she needs to eat so they don’t go to bed hungry.

When you’re divorced, the opportunity for parenting differences rises. The key is to remind yourself that you can’t force your ex to be the parent you want him/her to be. They have their own style and parenting techniques. Unless it is legitimately harmful to the child, you should learn to work with it.

That sounds harsh, but a court isn’t going to give you full custody because your ex always feeds pasta for dinner on his/her nights. The sooner you understand and accept this, the sooner you will improve your relationship and the co-parenting dynamic.

2. Always do what is best for the children, not yourself.

When you are dealing with conflict and you’re not sure what to do, think about what is best for the children. The focus should always be on them, not you or your ex. Why?

Because that’s what most courts will focus on.

Do you think your child would benefit from summer camp rather than doing nothing? Is contributing to the future education of your children important, even though you the court hasn’t forced you to… yet? What about helping pay for that school trip even though you don’t have to under your child support obligation?

My point is do what is best for your children even if you are not obligated to by a court order and even if you’re mad at your ex. It’s not about them, it’s about the children.


you can read the full article here: http://huff.to/1pvPX6y

For more information regarding divorce, we recommend that you contact us at the Law Office of Alice Pare at 301-515-1190 or visit our website at: https://www.alicelaw.com

Do not at any time take the risky move of going at it alone.  We have a wide choice when it comes to going it alone but with the professional advice, you will need.

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